she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
