im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
