I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
