High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
