last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize