did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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