Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
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