Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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