I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
