I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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