girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize