Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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