it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
