Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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