oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
