White coat. Heels.
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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