Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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