I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize