We won't sleep together?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
