She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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