The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
