He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
