Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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