So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize
