Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
