For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
