I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
My balls are so social today.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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