I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
