I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
