This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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