You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
