I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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