im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
