we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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