i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize