I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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