I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
