She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
