Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
