Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
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