I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
