How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
