he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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