I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
