His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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