i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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