i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize