you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
