Swine flu. Run for my life!
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
