what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
