i need an iv and a liver transplant
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
they're like a gay fantastic four
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize