Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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